Saturday, July 19, 2008

Tick tock, tick tock

As a spinster you tend to think about your biological clock a lot and how everyday you are creeping closer and closer that dreaded age of 35 which is when scientists insist that fertility wanes and that your only hope is for a mutant child. For someone that has always wanted to have kids and be a mom, it is a scary thought to think your body is on a timetable. I mean at this point in my reproductive life my twenties are basically shot and if I don't reproduce in the next five years or so I am laughing in the face of fate. So in this torment of emotion it's no bad thing when you're reminded that having kids isn't always a walk in the park or if it is it requires a many hours to get the kids and their stuff ready to take to the park and then the kids will cry when you eventually have to leave the park and you and the children when be very dirty after the excursion.

I just got back from visiting my sister's family. She has two little girls aged 1 and 3 and after spending 24 hours a day with them for over two straight weeks, I am exhausted and sleep deprived! I think there wasn't one night where one of the kids wasn't up and crying in the middle of the night for some reason. It's hard being a Mom. I love my nieces, but it made me very glad to be single and childfree, at least for now. Perhaps I am not cut out for motherhood after all. I know, I know everyone says when you have you're own kids it will be different. It's just other people's kids that are difficult. While I think this may be partially true, I don't know that I totally buy it. Kids in general just demand all of your attention. There are no two ways about it, having kids involves lots of sacrifice, devotion and energy! I just don't if I'm up to that anymore, maybe when I was 23, but I don't have that boundless energy and patience I might have had when I was younger. Oh well maybe I will never have to find out if I have it now or not.

Speaking of biological clocks, I just read an article that levels the playing field just a bit. A recent study has shown that men have a biological clock too! Apparently men reproducing over the age of 35 are linked to lower pregnancy rates and higher miscarriage rates. The damaged sperm of older men can also lead to some childhood dieases in their offspring. See the article:
So let's get the word out. Guys should stop thinking that they can play the field for however long they want without any consequences, even if they do eventually marry a younger woman. Ok that's my take on the matter at hand. I'd like to hear if you ever feel the same way.

Wednesday, July 2, 2008

Matchmaker, matchmaker...

So I'm visiting my sister in England right now and last night we went to enrichment at her ward. I know some of the ladies there from my last visit and one of them said, 'so how would you like to live in England?!?' I was thinking like hmm do you have a good job for me in England? Nope that wasn't it. She and several other ladies were like 'ooh she should meet Colin (name changed to protect the innocent)' and then they proceeded to talk about this single guy in the ward (the only young single guy in the ward) that I should date. Everyone was like 'oh yeah, that would be good', like they had all just had a little epiphany or something. It was kind of cute and made me laugh, but seriously folks could that ever work out. Apparently because Colin and I are both over a certain age and single so we should hit it off right away. If only that was the only requirements you needed in a mate. Nevermind I'm only here for another week and you know we live thousands and thousands of miles apart.

The funny thing is my sister and brother in law had already invited him to a party we're having. I think married people are sometimes in so excited to match you up that they scour their minds for any other single person they know around your age, regardless of whether your personalities really mesh. Not that I wouldn't mind living in England, although my Mom would kill me for moving so far away near my sister and then she wouldn't have any children living in the states.

I had another friend who recently tried to set me up on another one of these improbable match dates. Last semester she had a professor who was single in his (late!) thirties, who she said just needed to get married. She thought 'hey, they are both academic types, they'll hit it off.' When she mentioned this to me I of course googled him and found a photo and a few not so flattering reviews of him on the website Rate My Professor. It didn't sound promising and as she told me more it sounded like this guy had almost no sense of humor. Blah, that's what I need most! Anyway, I jettisoned that blind date idea, because it just seemed like oh you're both single and intellectual you're totally hit it off. Again, not a lot of thought went into if this was really a good match.

Anyway, thank you married friends for thinking of us spinsters but please screen all potential matches for suitable personality and interest levels as opposed to just age and marital status.