So I asked my Chinese friend today what they call women that never marry in China. She replied with a laugh,"old virgins". And that is exactly how I felt today and it really had nothing to do with Valentine's Day.
I had a doctor's appt for the first time at the student clinic so I had to fill out all that paperwork that goes along with being a new patient, including a form that asks about your past medical history. This was the most extensive medical history form I had ever seen, it asked about your spirituality and if you prayed among other things. There was also a half a page or more about your sex life. The first question of course being have you ever had sex. My pencil hovered over the check boxes yes, no or never (I'm not sure why they needed both no and never, but they were both there). At that moment I felt like a very old virgin. I'm sure the doctors don't see a lot of virgins in their late twenties at the University of Utah. Would I be the oldest virgin they had ever seen???
In the church it's expected that you'll probably be a virgin until you get married, but to society at large it seems a tad freakish, like that movie The 40 year old Virgin. I've only seen part of that movie on tv, but Steve Carrell is a comic book loving techie who is a bit socially awkward (hmmm, is that the stereotype of a male spinster? That could be a good post later on). Am I like Steve Carrell's character to the world or am I more like a nun? Oh well being a virgin ain't a bad thing there's a lot I don't have to worry about, but sometimes its does feel like everyone is a part of this club that I don't belong to and they have a secret I don't know.
Anyway, so how did I answer the question? I left it blank! What do they need to know about my sex life or lack thereof? For now it will be my little secret.
3 comments:
There are a lot of "old virgins."
And unless you were going in for a pelvic exam, they shouldn't be asking such questions. The form sounds dated.
The University of Utah has plenty of Mormon patients, doctors, nurses, medical personnel. They're not going to laugh at your for keeping the law of chastity. And surprise, surprise, I have a several friends who are nearing their 30s, who are not LDS, who are still virgins. It's not so uncommon as you would think.
Also, I'm proud of being virgin -it's an accomplishment! I had a boyfriend in his 30s who was surprised to find out I was still a virgin, because most of the women he had dated were not. And he mainly dated LDS women. So wear the celibate badge with pride I say.
Besides, a lot of married people aren't having as much sex as they'd like us to think. Ha!
Last September I had an appointment with an ob-gyn, and she suggested a follow-up appointment a few months down the road. Then she said, "Why don't you just come in for your next pap smear and we can get everything done at once?" I then reminded her I was a virgin, and she sighed and said, "That's so smart. If more people were like you, I'd have less than half my patients and more time to enjoy life."
"The first question of course being have you ever had sex. My pencil hovered over the check boxes yes, no or never" This is hilarious! I'll tell my friends that we're not the only coubtry where you can find stupid questions.
But if I try to be serious about it I would think it is actually to have correct answers from the girls in total denial of their sexual activity who automatically answer "no" when they are asked if they ever had sex.
I could be wrong, though. You should have asked.
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