So I'm visiting my sister in England right now and last night we went to enrichment at her ward. I know some of the ladies there from my last visit and one of them said, 'so how would you like to live in England?!?' I was thinking like hmm do you have a good job for me in England? Nope that wasn't it. She and several other ladies were like 'ooh she should meet Colin (name changed to protect the innocent)' and then they proceeded to talk about this single guy in the ward (the only young single guy in the ward) that I should date. Everyone was like 'oh yeah, that would be good', like they had all just had a little epiphany or something. It was kind of cute and made me laugh, but seriously folks could that ever work out. Apparently because Colin and I are both over a certain age and single so we should hit it off right away. If only that was the only requirements you needed in a mate. Nevermind I'm only here for another week and you know we live thousands and thousands of miles apart.
The funny thing is my sister and brother in law had already invited him to a party we're having. I think married people are sometimes in so excited to match you up that they scour their minds for any other single person they know around your age, regardless of whether your personalities really mesh. Not that I wouldn't mind living in England, although my Mom would kill me for moving so far away near my sister and then she wouldn't have any children living in the states.
I had another friend who recently tried to set me up on another one of these improbable match dates. Last semester she had a professor who was single in his (late!) thirties, who she said just needed to get married. She thought 'hey, they are both academic types, they'll hit it off.' When she mentioned this to me I of course googled him and found a photo and a few not so flattering reviews of him on the website Rate My Professor. It didn't sound promising and as she told me more it sounded like this guy had almost no sense of humor. Blah, that's what I need most! Anyway, I jettisoned that blind date idea, because it just seemed like oh you're both single and intellectual you're totally hit it off. Again, not a lot of thought went into if this was really a good match.
Anyway, thank you married friends for thinking of us spinsters but please screen all potential matches for suitable personality and interest levels as opposed to just age and marital status.
9 comments:
My theory is that everyone has a Matchmaking Slot Machine inside their heads. They put your name in like a quarter and out pops a name or two they could set you up with. When you are young and the pressure is less, the little pictures that line up to give them a name include interests and hobbies and personality, but as you get older and they get more stressed for you, the only picture that matters to them is 'SINGLE' and then they run with the idea. Case in point: A lady in my ward who thought it would be an excellent idea to set me up with a divorced 45 year-old men with 4 daughters, one of whom was 24. I was 28 at the time. And now I work with his soon-to-be 17 year-old daughters in YW.
this reminds me of a quote lots of people in our region seem to say " It's really easy to get married in the Church if you want too" Of course which implies that anyone who is single is so because they want to be.
My response is " Really? Is there a special lesson I missed which teaches you the secret of how to do that?"
I forgot to mention that I hope 'Colin' ends up being more Mr. Darcy than Mr. Collins. Because everyone deserves a happy ending!
Personally, I quite enjoy blind dates, and I've yet to go on a bad one. Also, my sister met her husband on a blind date. My perspective is that because I'm a very busy person and live in an area in which the closest young adults are an hour away in any direction, it's nice that other church members are helping me meet more young adults and potential dates.
I don't mind setups, as long as the person who is setting us up doesn't expect that we're going to get married or something. The way I see things, I don't go on a lot of dates anyway, so why not go out with this guy? Also, I see it as sort of a compliment when people want to set me up with their family friends or whatever. In many cases all we have in common is that we are latter-day saints and single, but at least we can have a few hours of company and a dinner or something. I totally agree that if people have expectations that you're going to hit it off, single and latter-day saint should not be the only things you have in common.
"If only that was the only requirements you needed in a mate."
Interesting you should use the word "mate." Maybe all that is needed for a "mate" is just the opposite sex. And some people seem to be fine with that idea. "As long as he's male and mormon, let's go." It's as though anything is better than being single. Rather than having just a mate, how about a partner, an equal, a friend, . . . . ? Oooh, don't I sound radical? (heh.)
I've learned to only accept blind dates from people who know me well. My bro-in-law met this guy in his college class and thought we'd hit it off. Turns out, the guy spoke mostly of World of Warcraft, hadn't even heard of Facebook (not that everyone should know about the site, I just thought this was really weird and felt like he was hiding under a WofW rock or something), wasn't into outdoorsy stuff (something I love), and a few other things I don't remember. We were just definitely not meant to be and my bro-in-law wasn't able to see that. It was nice of him to think of me, though.
(BUT... it was a waste of my time!)
All I have to say is ... AMEN!
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