(Hi guys, Here is a post from a friend of mine. I thought you'd enjoy hearing her thoughts on the dating and what not.)
Being a 26 year old single girl, I have had a lot of time to observe relationships and here are just a few of my observations.
The nice girls always finish last-meaning the nice girls are never the ones that are getting married. I consider myself to be a pretty nice girl. I feel that I will treat my future husband very well and also feel that I treat other people very well, considering. I have noticed that the girls that are the ones getting married are not so nice. I watch my sister-in-law for example. She is so mean to my brother. Nothing is ever good enough for her, and every time I am around her, she is telling him what to do. It’s always, Mark (name has been changed) get me that pencil, Mark go wash the dishes, Mark we are going to go visit my family this week, Mark I don’t feel good so we can’t be with your family, Mark I want I want I want. I feel that my brother is always giving so much to her, and she whines so she can get her way. Granted, my brother is dumb enough to fall into her traps, but still. I have even seen him change when he is around our family in order to make her happy. Again, he falls into her traps, but he is a different person since he married her because of the way she treats him.
Independent girls also don’t get the guys. So I can change a light bulb myself. Whoop de doo. So I can change the door knobs on my front door by myself. It’s really not that hard. Who cares? Apparently the guys do. For some reason guys have this need to feel needed. They like it when helpless girls to ask them to do simple favors for them. When a girl asks a guy to do a favor for her, he falls immediately in love with her and will do anything for her. Why is that? What is it about the girl who can’t do anything when a guy is around that attracts them?
It is necessary to touch every guy nonstop when he is around. Story-so I lived with two really annoying girls that somehow were able to mesmerize any guy that walked into our house. I believe it was because they would touch every guy and just hold onto his arm the whole time he was there. How am I supposed to talk to a guy when my roommates were hanging onto him and would not let go of his arm? I couldn’t do it. No, I’m not jealous. I really am not. But it was really annoying when every guy that entered into our house was somehow sucked into their trap.
This last one is just a frustration story about a previous roommate. At one time she was dating three different guys at the same time. I’m sorry, but I just don’t see how you can feel good about yourself when you are dating three people at once. The first guy she met while working together. They went out for probably over a year. She couldn’t decide if she liked him, but really it was that he wasn’t attractive enough for her. So then came along guy #2 with beautiful eyes, but she said she just couldn’t talk to him like she could talk to guy #1. She wished guy #1 looked like guy #2 or that guy #2 could communicate like guy #1 could. Personally, I think there is more to a guy than being beautiful. I would rather date somebody that is not so hot and be able to communicate with him. But maybe I’m not like most people. While trying to decide between guy #1 and guy #2, guy #3 came along. He was funny, but I don’t think he was beautiful enough either. Either way, at one point, she was dating three different guys at the same time. She finally decided guy #1 wasn’t beautiful enough, guy #2 wasn’t a good enough communicator, and I think guy #4 came along before she was happy with guy #3. So currently she is dating guy #4 and things are apparently going well. Good luck to her. Do you want to know the twist-at her surprise birthday party, guy #1, guy #2, guy #3, and guy #4 were all there. How’s that for awkward?
Anyway, I probably sound like I’m bitter, but I’m really not. I've just seen a lot of guys friends ruined by girls. And I think it’s interesting that the whiny, dependent, touchy girls are the ones that get the guys. Don’t guys want to be treated kindly and be able to have some sort of freedom? Maybe I just need to change my ways and become helpless and needy…Please come rub my feet for me boys, and while you're at it, take me on expensive dates because that's what I deserve.
5 comments:
I don't think nice girls finish last. I know a lot of nice girls that are married.
But it is frustrating when you can look at someone else's relationship objectively, and see that one half is being mistreated in the marriage. Although no matter how mean a wife might be to her husband in public, it doesn't mean that he's not getting what he wants behind closed doors. Every relationship has a different dynamic, and it's impossible to judge it accordingly, especially if one might have some sort of bias (like seeing a brother being married to a girl that they don't like).
There are a lot of annoying girls out there who have no shame in using their skills of manipulation to get what they want, especially when it comes to men. However I think it's important to realize that men really need to have their ego stroked once in a while. They have self-esteem issues just like us women. Just like it's nice to feel that he finds you sexy, it feels nice to him to know that you find him attractive and even "manly" in some way. Even though as strong independent women we really don't NEED them, I think it's important for everyone to feel needed. And there's nothing wrong with letting someone know that we need them... even if we don't. Part of being in a relationship is fulfilling your partners needs. And if they need an ego boost, there's no reason not to give them one.
I think timing is everything. And as LDS women, we need to remind ourselves that the Lord has the best timeline in mind for us.
It sounds narcissistic, but I feel special in some ways that I wasn't married at 19. My life is even better than I ever could have imagined. Sure I have my lonely moments, and I've even had my moments of desperation, but when I try my best to step back and look at my life from a different vantage point, I can't believe how blessed I am. I look forward to future blessings as a wife and mother, but as of now I am in awe at present blessings I receive as a single woman.
I think it's best to remove yourself from the slutty roommate situation. It's disgusting to watch that, and it can really bring a nice girl down. The slutty roommate will eventually get what's coming for her... we all will in the end.
Interesting post. It certainly is thought-provoking. I guess my attitude on that kind of thing is, would I want to get a guy that wouldn't want a smart, somewhat independent woman who respected him?
I think that the heart of this topic is the question How do you get someone to like you for who you really are and not turn into some fauning,manipulative, superficial flirt? I'm sure this isn't what all guys want, but it is hard when you see a nice guy that you perhaps could even see yourself with get his priorites mixed up and get taken in by a possibly beautiful, but high maintenence, manipulative mean girl. I mean it can happen to the girls too, I've crushed on some good-looking, very charming, but ultimately shallow guys that just weren't right for me. I was taken in by there smooth words, but thankfully those crushes didn't go anywhere. But I would hope if they had my friends would bring me back to reality. So it just makes you wonder if later these guys regret marrying girls like this. And you can't help but feel a little bit sorry for them. Ok that's my two cents worth.
good point, ww. You do have to look at the kind of guys that are marrying these types of girls. However it does suck when a guy you care about(brother, friend, secret crush, etc) is taken advantage of by these flirty, needy girls.
here's another good line from a guy at 25 i was told i would never get married because i was to opinionated, now i agree that i have some opinions but who doesnt form opinions on life after having lived independantly for a few years! i laughed good at that one
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