This blog is by an LDS spinster for LDS spinsters. How would I define spinster? Well in society at large it's any woman say 40 or over that isn't married. In the LDS world it's much much younger than that. Anything over 25 feels spinsterish, but once you hit 31 and you haven't mangaged to enter marital bliss, well sorry, but you've reached your expiration date. They kick you out of the single's ward. because obviously the system has failed you. and you're put out to pasture. Not that giving up the singles ward scene is some great loss, but the message is loud and clear-it's too late for you. Ouch!
So in preparation for that event I got on the internet and started googling for some kind of support group for unmarried LDS women over a certain age. I couldn't find anything!
I know there are quite a few women out there in my same situation. I know more than a few of them myself. Great gals-- beautiful, intelligent gals, somehow marriage had eluded them, either by choice or happenstance or cosmic forces, who knows. But they are out there and they need to have a voice. So lack of a better option I have stepped in as that voice.
Now I don't know who is going to read this blog and how exactly they will find it. But I know it will serve as an outlet for me and maybe we can rally the troops and stop being a silent minority.
2 comments:
Woot!
I just decided to give up on the singles wards, and went to a family ward for the first time in nearly nine years. It was wonderful. I had forgotten what a welcoming place church can be when you're not being so harshly judged. Singles wards: most of the men don't even want to make eye contact with you because they fear you're only after two things -their money and their sperm. Worse though can be the other women: constantly sizing one another up, checking out the competition.
Sure not all singles wards are that terrible, but they certainly are only meant to be transitory. Having a lack of a sense of permanence makes one rarely feel like they can settle in and feel at home in a ward.
Good for you for being this voice. I think I'll blog about this on my blog. I was the Service blogger for yourldsneighborhood.com and got in the habit of looking for services to highlight. Look for it on www.sezlizadair.blogspot.com
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